Probably the best line from from the 1994 stinker “Major League II” is when play-by-play announcer Harry Doyle describes an opponent’s home run with “He’ll need a rocket up his [BLEEP] to catch that one. That baby’s gone!”
Well, Harry, that one’s been tried. And the result has the rocket launcher’s fraternity being sued. [The West Virginia Record, via Legal Newsline; HT: Marcia McBrien @CourtInfo, which, if you are on Twitter, you should follow.]
A man is suing Alpha Tau Omega after he was injured at a frat party. Travis Hughes, another man at the party, was also named as a defendant in the suit.
On May 1, 2011, at about 1:30 a.m., the fraternity was having a house party both Louis Helmberg III and Hughes were attending, according to a complaint filed Jan. 23 in Cabell Circuit Court.
Helmberg, who plays for Marshall University’s baseball team, claims Hughes became intoxicated and attempted to “shoot bottle rockets out of his anus on the ATO deck.”
When doing so, Hughes startled Helmberg, who then jumped back and fell off of the deck of the fraternity house and was injured, according to the suit. He was lodged between the deck and an air conditioning unit.
The suit actually alleges that the fraternity should have had a railing on the deck, which might have prevented the guy from falling 3 to 4 feet off the edge.
So he didn’t exactly sue the kid for shooting rockets out of his anus. But still, this case goes from the bottom of the barrel to the top of the imaginary standings for 2012 Lawsuit of the Year.
And those of you with kids in college, eh, I’m sure they’re not doing this kind of stuff.